motivate me.

I'm so tired of being tired! I want and need to get into shape. I think most women get so worn out by their day to day lives that we forget to take care of ourselves. I know I have.

To be honest I am OK with the way I look. I'm curvy! (nice way to say chubby) LOL I wouldn't be upset about losing some weight though. I know I have to lose weight to have more energy and be healthier. I need to be healthier. Physically, mentally, emotionally! I have gone through SO much this last year and I feel like I have been beat up in every way.

I know I would be happier if I took the time to focus on my health and work out each morning. But why can't I get my "curvy" butt out of bed???

I'm tired. It's cold. And I am simply LAZY!

I need motivation! I need a kick in the "curvy" butt!

allowing laughter

I'm sitting here listening to Coop giggle and laugh.
Amazed at how easy it is for him to find joy in something.
I think about how I love to laugh.
I don't laugh as much as I used to.
I want to be happy enough to laugh when I want to. I feel like I don't let myself laugh and giggle when my heart tells me too. It's like I am telling myself... STOP! Don't be happy! DANGER!

If I'm not happy then I can't get hurt. I won't be disappointed.

I hate this about me. It's not the real Katie. Katie is loving and fun and a big ole GOOF! Just ask my family. I think they miss Katie. The person I am is not me.

You know those dumb scifi movies were aliens take over bodies and take over the world???

I feel like that sometimes. Like my body is being inhabited by some cranky, sad, downer alien.

Satan got to my ex and broke up an eternal family. And now he is trying to break me. He uses my heart break and trials to bring me down.

NO WAY!!! Not happening MR!!!

I'm done feeling like this!
I'm going to laugh!
Right now!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! (Im really laughing)

And one day my fake laughter will be genuine and I will be able to smile when my heart tells me to.

Life is so fragile.
Short.
IMPORTANT!!!!